After the crisis: self-care for you

You've been sexually assaulted. You may be struggling to cope with the challenges of caring for yourself and taking another step or two along the path of healing. Every step you take, and every day that passes, moves you further away from that traumatic experience and closer to your recovery.

The people who love and care about you want to provide as much comfort and support as they can. But good self-care is also an important factor in your recovery. Self-care strategies are most effective when they become a top priority -- and a habit.

Physical self-care for you

Maintain good medical care.   It's easy to put off going to the doctor or clinic, but be sure to make and keep those appointments. If you don't, small health problems that might have been simple to take care of can become a lot more complicated.

Get plenty of sleep.   Most people require seven to 10 hours of sleep per night. The key thing is to ensure a peaceful environment that will maximize your ability to get as much rest as your body needs. Sleep heals!

Eat right.   Food provides both nourishment and comfort. It's not always possible to organize your life to ensure three good meals every day, but you should at least try to eat a healthy, balanced diet that delivers solid nutritional value. As long as you don't overdo them, occasional treat foods and goodies are also can also give you a psychological mini-boost.

Stay active.   This is one of the most overlooked areas of self-care. You should try to achieve 30 minutes of exercise at least five times per week. If you enjoy activities like cycling, jogging, golf or team sports, try your best to keep them a part of your lifestyle. Even a quick lunchtime walk in the sunshine will get your blood pumping, muscles moving and help reduce negative feelings, stress and depression.

Emotional self-care for you

Meditation soothes your spirit.   Many people find value in using relaxation techniques to restore and maintain their emotional health. This example is a good place to start:

• Sit or stand comfortably with your back straight and feet flat on the floor.
• Place one hand on your belly button and breathe in slowly through your nose for a count of four, letting your tummy expand as you inhale. Concentrate on relaxing your tummy muscles as you inhale.
• Hold your breath for four seconds, and then exhale slowly through your mouth for another count of four. Try to keep the rest of your body relaxed; your shoulders should not rise and fall as you breathe.
• Keep counting and repeating this deep inhale-hold-deep exhale cycle, and you should begin to feel a calming effect.

Keep a diary.   Some people find that recording their thoughts and feelings in a journal or diary helps them to manage their emotions.

Counselling.   Joining a support group or talking with a professional counsellor experienced in supporting people who have been sexually assaulted may be helpful to your healing process.

AASAS member agencies are able to help people who have suffered sexual abuse or sexual assault, or whose life is affected by a loved one's experience. If you're ready, you can click here to connect with resources in your community.

Nurture your relationships.   Your emotional self-care can also involve the people in your life who make you feel good about yourself. Make it a priority to spend quality time with these friends and family members. You may also feel comfortable connecting with a support group for survivors of sexual assault or abuse; other member can relate to your situation.

Set some boundaries.   Be careful to avoid people who are unable (or unwilling) to listen to you, who want to dismiss or analyze your experience or who leave you feeling depressed. Cutting negative family members out of your life may not be an option, but you can control the amount of time you spend around them (avoid open-ended time commitments, for example) or see them only as part of a group. If there are days when you just don't feel like communicating with the world, screen your calls or turn off your phone; there's no rule requiring you to answer every ringtone.

Get involved.   Many survivors have full, busy lives -- families, jobs, school. Finding time to enjoy leisure activities can be a big challenge, but this is a vital part of your self-care. Get involved with other people in a hobby, sport or volunteer organization that you really love. Being part of a group-oriented activity or project can be motivating. When you have plans for doing "fun" things, be sure to mark them on your calendar and treat them as important!